The first Wednesday of every month The Domestic Violence Shelter will present our “Wednesday Workshop” on Facebook. This month, Jill and Shannon discuss how to get out of a rut. If you missed the video, follow this link to our Facebook page! If you have any questions not covered in this post, or would like to speak to a trained advocate, call our 24/7 Crisis Line at 1-800-931-SAFE (7233)

The Shelter:

The Domestic Violence Shelter was one of the first three shelters in Ohio when we opened the doors in 1979. The Shelter is more than just a safe place for survivors of domestic violence, sexual assault, dating violence and stalking- we are also a program. You can learn more about these programs by going to http://www.thedvshelter.com/. The Shelter offers the following programs and services:

  • 24/7 Crisis Line: 1-800-931-SAFE (7233)
  • Emergency Shelter
  • Case Management
  • Youth Advocacy
  • Peer Support Groups
  • Sexual Assault Advocacy Program
  • Legal Advocacy
  • Community Education
  • Outreach
  • Volunteer Program

How do you know you are in a rut?

We all go through periods of time where we feel like we might be stuck in a rut. It’s not uncommon to feel like you are just going through the motions. You might feel unmotivated or think that every day seems to be the same. These feelings can be frustrating, depressing or can cause anxiety. It’s important to not only be aware of the times you are in a rut but also learn how to get unstuck.

Finding the Source of Your Rut

You may recognize the feelings of being stuck, but may not be able to pinpoint what is causing the rut. It’s important you find out what is causing you to feel this way before you make any drastic changes. Some common factors can include the following:

Your Partner: If your relationship seems stagnant, or is not giving you what you need it can contribute to you feeling stuck.

Job: Even if you really enjoy your job, you may not feel completely satisfied. If your job is very repetitive, or you follow the same routine every day, this could be the cause of your rut.

Health Concerns: If you’ve been working towards a health goal or coping with a medical issue, it can be disheartening not to see the results you want to achieve.

Family and Friends: Even if you love them very much, friends and family can be the cause of your rut. If these relationships are draining or not going the way you want them to, this could contribute to your feelings.

Home: Your home life can impact how you feel in your life. Do you feel like every day is the same at home (especially if you have been working from home or quarantining through the pandemic!)? The physical state of your home could even contribute to your rut.

11 Signs You Are In A Rut And How To Get Unstuck

  1. You dream about getting away: Are you always wishing you were somewhere else? The COVID-19 pandemic may impede upon your vacation dreams, but it’s still important to do something that helps you escape your normal routine.
  2. You don’t look forward to much: You may find that you only look forward to getting through the day or sleeping. If you don’t have anything to look forward to, think about the things you have around you. Instead of looking for something huge to happen, keep an eye out for all the little things life has to offer.
  3. No matter how hard you try, it feels like you are going no where: It’s not uncommon to feel this way. Change things up! Try a new routine, challenge yourself or work on developing new habits.
  4. You look at other people’s lives with envy: It’s easy to assume that someone is living a better life than you (especially when you look at their life on social media!). But realistically, that person is probably going through their own struggles, some that could even be similar to yours. Until you walk in that person’s shoes, you don’t know what they are going through so we can never judge others.
  5. Even though you check things off your to-do list, it doesn’t feel like you are getting much done: You may be aiming for perfection, and you feel little sense of accomplishment no matter how much you get done. Be happy with the things you do accomplish. You will feel productive and better about not being so hard on yourself.
  6. You want to get those creative juices flowing but you are running on empty: IF you are feeling uninspired, set an hour aside every week and channel your energy into something you want to do (not something you need to do!). It can give you a boost and refresh yourself.
  7. You feel bored most of the time: Think about something you did in the past that made you feel good and make time to do it. Go on a walk, watch a movie, listen to music, visit a place you like, make a favorite recipe, etc.
  8. You stay home instead of going out: It’s one thing to be a home body, but another if you never want to leave the house. This can be incredibly difficult when COVID-19 precautions keep you at home. Find excuses to leave the house, even if it’s just to go on a walk or drink a cup of coffee on your porch.
  9. You make excuses for not doing things: How often do you say “I don’t have time”? Look inside yourself and determine why you don’t have time. Is it fear? Lack of confidence? Consider journaling to work through these feelings and challenge yourself to stop making these excuses.
  10. You often see yourself as the martyr: Make a list of the things that make you feel like a martyr, recognize your role in each situation, then brainstorm ways to change them. Check them off the list as you do this to help you take control of the situation.
  11. You don’t see the purpose of anything you do: Find something that gives you purpose. It doesn’t have to be anything big- just something that feels meaningful to you. Get involved in the community, find a new hobby, explore new ways to get healthy- whatever gives you purpose.

30 Day Challenge

Matt Cutts talks about using a 30 Day Challenge to help get yourself out of a rut. 30 days seems like a long time, but it’s the perfect amount of time to try something new or to start (or break) a habit. What will you do for your 30 day challenge?

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